yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
last night I used snow as a chaser
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
