i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
I think your dad took our porno
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
