I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Randomize
