windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
