he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
