I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
