Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
