..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
