It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
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