I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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