guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
