did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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