I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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