we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
