Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
