we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Randomize
