D3 body, D1 cock
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
17 year olds will be the death of me.
cat food counts as protein by the way
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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