In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
