My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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