So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Randomize
