it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
