It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
