butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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