He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
In other news, I just burned my penis
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
