Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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