okay pat passed out under dana's car
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
