apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
Fuck appropriateness.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
