I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
