You're so nebulous sometimes
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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