we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
the day after is always just damage control
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
