why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Randomize
