We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
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