If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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