90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
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