Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize