I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
