Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Randomize
