i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
