i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
We have started to decorate penises.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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