he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Randomize
