he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
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