ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
