I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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