It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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