try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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