i think my mom watched the whole time
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
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