thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
