Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
