you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
