high people should be assigned attendants
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Randomize
